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Lifespan Development

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Psychotherapy and Mental Health questions

Confusion From a College Long Distance Relationship

Last year, I started my first year at college. During that time, I had a boyfriend from high school who I had been with for 2 years already. We decided to try a long distance relationship since we loved each and still wanted to be with each other. When I entered college, things were harder than I expected. I became depressed and very lonely, and I had no clue what to do. I broke up with my high school boyfriend and began trying to date other people because I thought it would be easier. It ended up not being easier and I often didn't feel fulfilled as I did in my high school relationship.

Fast forward to present day, after numerous break ups with him and dating other people (breaking up and hurting them as well), we decided to get back together again. Things are better than they were last year, but I'm still having similar thoughts. I can honestly say I truly love him and when we see each other, I am incredibly happy, but when he's gone, I'm a different person. I have thoughts of other men occasionally, thoughts about being single, and how tough this is. I feel like leaving the relationship again because it will allow me to find out who I really am and what I want, but at the same time, I feel as if I went through all that last year and at the end, I wanted him back. Is this normal for long distance relationships in college or is there something else that may be causing this?

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